Real life starts today, apparently.

Got back from Vegas on Saturday, had to work yesterday and I'm finally feeling normal today.
Took almost 2 days to recover from a trip that lasted less than 48 hours.
I need to clean my room, unpack and adjust back into life as I know it.
Today, marks the beginning of something major.
I have my first supervision sessions at the clinic today where I get a look at my client files for the first time and discuss them.
I still can't believe I'm going to have clients, that people are going to depend on me, and only me.
I mean I am only a student therapist, so it's not like I am expected to know everything, but it will still be just me and the client in the room. That is a lot of pressure riding on my shoulders.

I've started reading a new book:

So far I haven't been able to really get into it. Although, I can't really knock it since my first attempts at reading it were on a trip to Vegas, so to say my mind was else where would be an understatement. I am looking forward to having some down time this summer (sans classes and just focusing on work and my practicum) to actually read for pleasure.
I ask my sister-in-law for book suggestions. I started doing this last summer and have yet to be disappointed by a book she's suggested. They're never books I'd choose on my own, even this newest one, but I just take her advice and I am usually fairly pleased with the books in the end. This was her first suggestion and she's already given me another despite the fact that I'm only about 30 pages into this one. The good news is: I have a pool at my apartment (well, 3 actually) so I plan to spend a good amount of time near it, with books.

Relief!

This morning: took my clinical competency exam (the one that determines if I get to start seeing clients next week)
Definitely wasn't sure how well I did. I know I didn't study as much as I probably should have, but my brain is just done.
At 4pm: Got the email notification that I PASSED!!!!!
Such a relief.
So to celebrate? A mental vacation:

Yes. This is happening, and without any shame.
Only a few more days until VEGAS!!! I have another comp exam on Thursday, but nothing is riding on that one, and I can retake it a few times before it actually matters. No sweat... tonight I relish in the glory, and maybe pack a little for Vegas too :)

There is a light at the end

I am fairly certain I passed that final today.
Pretty damn proud of myself, although we won't know our grades for sure until next week.
Also, I finished BOTH papers that are due by Friday so all I have left (this week) is 1 final exam!
I am starting to feel like I've actually accomplished something.
After this last final on Thursday, I will have completed my 1st year of graduate school.
Hot Damn... look at me.

So close, I can almost taste it! Well, I don't actually want to taste it, that would be gross. I'm finally seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. 9 more days until VEGAS!!!!!
I still have to get through Comps... but I'm that much closer.

Hectic week

Job schedule this week: Work Tue-Wed-Thurs 5:15am-11:30
Finals schedule this week: Final Tue 1pm, Final Thur 1pm and a 12 page paper and a 4 page paper due Thursday.
Now all I need is to find some time to sleep and study somewhere in there.

Tomorrow is a HUGE day.
That final exam determines whether or not I pass stats or fail it and have to take it again next year.
It also determines whether or not I am able to take the comp exam next week or wait an entire year for me to pass stats.

No pressure though. HAH!

Woody Allen

I wonder if it is just getting older in general, or something specific due to my ever growing cynicism and doubts that life actually ever has happy endings (although, compared to my teenage angst filled years I'm much more optimistic in recent years, as hard as that is for most to believe)... but I've really grown to appreciate Woody Allen's work.
I remember seeing the movie Match Point years ago and I remember hating it.
Well, hate is probably too drastic of a word, but I definitely recall a strong dislike for the movie.
I have yet to watch it again, but it got me thinking recently.
It started with Annie Hall:

 I just loved the idea that not everything ends up the way you think it should. It probably helped that I watched this post-the worst break up of my life.
Regardless of how many times they came back together , or thought it should work, it didn't. No one wants to think that and most of Hollywood doesn't let you think that...
but in all actuality, it's far more common than those fairy tale endings most movies promise you.

The dialogue in his movies is intense, thought provoking, raw, and real.

So tonight, I'm watching Manhattan:

I absolutely love this scene. Profoundly beautiful, in the simplest way.



Maybe I'll have to re-watch Match Point. See how the late 20's version of me feels about it.

Birthday surprises in the mail

3 finals in 1 day should be illegal.
I mean, now that they're done and I'm on my second glass of wine...I'm glad I have a few less exams to worry about this weekend and can focus my efforts of Stats, but damn...today was rough.
There were a few upsides to today. I got TWO packages in the mail today for my birthday from two of my favorite people.

My friends are absolutely wonderful. Of course it would have been nice to get these on my actual birthday, but with how stressed I have been about today, it was actually a pretty perfect day for them to arrive.
I got one before I went and took the finals, and I got the other one the second I walked in the door when I got home from taking all my finals.

Of course I don't need any of these things, but they're all lovely because they mean something.  They're not just random gifts someone picks out when in a rush to get something or that you buy for people you don't know really well or feel obligated to buy something for.
That is really what is most important. It is never, ever about the cost.
It is about the thought.
Not to mention, I absolutely LOVE getting things in the mail. After moving away from home, this love intensified immensely.
When you feel lonely, and far away.. it feels good to know someone is thinking of you.