Monday, November 18, 2013

Week 46: Nov 11th-17th= Painful breakups with your life's plans

They say a break up is one of the best motivators for getting into shape/working out/losing weight. Well, J and I are still going strong but I had another "break up" of sorts happen last week and, although painful, it's proven to be the perfect motivator for me to get back on the fitness wagon.
I got a rejection email addressed "Dear esteemed applicant". So not only did I get the most painful rejection of my graduate career thus far, I got it as a mass email with the all other rejects. I applied to an internship site that was somewhat out of my league, ok really out of my league, BUT I was trying to give myself a little credit. The main appeal for me: it was in Portland. Getting rejected from an internship site itself isn't what hurt. I mean, I'm applying to (hopefully) 15 sites, and will only be offered a few interviews which leaves a lot of room for rejection, so that is expected.
Being rejected from the Portland site (which was the only one I even somewhat qualified for in that area) signifies a major loss for me. It means 1 more year away from home, one more year away from family and friends, another year before I can actually settle in and stop being transient, one more year of basically feeling like life plans need to be "on hold". While this "break up" with home is only temporary, and frankly it's been a long distance relationship since 2007 anyway, it still requires a mourning period. I need to grieve the loss of another year of holidays away, missing out on my niece, nephews, and goddaughters growing up, another year while J and I have to say "we'll get to that, once we move home" about our major life plans. So this break up with my life's plans was apparently just what I needed to jolt me out of this funk I've been in and get back to taking care of myself; the silver lining I suppose one could say.

My 5 things:

1. I started working out again: did 35 min on a treadmill (only about 3 of which were running) and I went to a Yoga class. Holy moly, was I sore after that! I'm still sore and that was 2 days ago.

2. I went in for an extra couple of hours to my practicum that weren't required and I didn't need to be there. I did it in order to build up rapport with a client and I think it was an excellent decision.

3. Watched Elf!

4. I made, or rather started to make, some ornaments that I plan to give as gifts. Working with my negative budget, this is likely going to be a very made-from-the-heart Christmas this year. I know my family will understand and I mean, my stuff isn't that bad ;)

5. Sunday I helped a woman who got robbed in my neighborhood. I didn't know her, and I'll likely never see her again, but I felt a moral obligation to help this person. I stayed with her through the police,the waiting, and the locksmith, until she was able to drive away. I had planned on spending the evening working on cover letters, but I think this was a bit more important.

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